I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
