is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
