Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
