you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
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