There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
