end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Randomize