After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
