in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
