Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
