fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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