you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Let's get the cat blown out
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
