What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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