I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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