my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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