why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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