2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
