This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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