I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
pop tarts are not kleenex
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
