Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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