Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
