i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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