she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
