I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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