we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
