corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
