Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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