did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
