I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
