What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
