i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
