but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
