Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
