..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
