Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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