Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize