i just google imaged poop.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
