I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
