Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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