i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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