I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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