i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Randomize
