Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
