It's Friday. Sex?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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