He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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