so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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