i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
