Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
