she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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