Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
