U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
