You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
